To be quite frank I was embarrassed and so were all the other customers. Cop: It's also against the law. Harriette Winslow: You have to understand, back in Detroit where he's from, the police are considered the enemy, so he doesn't trust them. Steve Urkel: [as Waldo hands Steve a cup of the spiked punch] Why should I Laura, I'm the pife of the larty! Oh, good. Gun, Carl. This is my mother. Steven Quincy Urkel: Don't interrupt me! Ms. Steuben: I know, Steven. Stefan and Myra of left stunned]. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Waldo! You gotta fix that machineeeee. Steve Urkel: Oh, Gosh golly, Jeepers Creepers. I'm playing Boyd double or nothing. Stefan Urquelle: Steve, what's up with your cousin? Well, actually it's Quincy, but you guys get the picture. Steve Urkel: Well, Laura doesn't want a date with me. Carl: Stefan, you gotta help me. "Tomorrow Dad!". I'll take this up later with the Lieutenant. Laura and Judy, divide up the rest between Barbie doll fans and Lego lovers and get them upstairs too! But honey, let's put a positive spin on it. [Eddie sits down and Carl grabs his hair]. Carl: What? You can do it! He's never used his! Or was it yellow? Rachel Crawford: Good. I didn't expect you to be in there and I feel like such a worm. Actor Jaleel White, famous for his cultural touchstone role as Steve Urkel in Family Matters, is entering the cannabis industry.Through a partnership with 710 Labs, White's new cannabis line . You trifled with my emotions! Laura: You know, I just don't get why people are so afraid of our history. Where did you get the money for this? [Handing out] Menu, menu, menu, menu, menu. Steven Quincy Urkel: Gee, I don't know, the speedometer only goes to thirty. Look, Steve. Laura: Waldo, what's with Steve, he's acting wierd, even for him! Cop: You two are going to juvenile hall until your parents pick you up. Carl: [after kicking Steve out of the house] And don't you ever come back! Carl Otis Winslow: [trying to convince his boss that using Urkelbot is a bad idea] But Sir, you and I have been to the Police Academy. Because, I already told him I do remember him. [Carl steps in the chamber and Stefan starts it up]. Let's just get there! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: O.k., but I'm not Home. He's so sad he could depress Richard Simmons. Our limo awaits. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: That's what I said, but Dad still said no. Curtis: I know you're disappointed. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No thanks, Eddie. Harriette Winslow: Well, Eddie said something came up, but he promised he'd empty the trash tomorrow. Carl, Eddie: [after Carl gets shocked from the electrical current] STEVE! I couldn't turn right around and refuse to go out with him. Carl Otis Winslow: Don't get cute with me Harriet. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Wait just a minute here, Mr.McClure. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Yeah, I went to sleep and Stevil made a guest appearance. Carl: Typical. Steve Urkel: Well, isn't that just a FIIIINE kettle of fish? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Harriette, stupid means good. Laura Lee Winslow: No! Wha? Waldo: Don't do it, Urkel! Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Waldo, You make up 1,000 flyers, Waldo Geraldo Faldo: But I'll get writer's cramp. Carl Otis Winslow: Edward Arthur Winslow, son I'm ashamed of you. Waldo: Laura, I know I'm just wasting my time, but would you like to kinda, maybe go out with me, sorta, tomorrow night, maybe? I don't know what to say. That's the last time I do anything for anybody in this house. Harriette: Come on, sweetie, let's get you home and then I can put some antiseptic on those cuts. Did you think of me while you guys were camping? He's a lawyer! Does that about cover it? Laura Lee Winslow: Grandma, you're not old. Harriette Winslow: [enters the house and sees Curtis] Hi. I never got less than than an A. Steve Urkel: So, I can't live with that! Laura Lee Winslow: [as Laura Wigglesworth, pointing a gun at Johnny] The narration to finish! Curtis: My whole family is flying out to Washington for the funeral, Laura: Can you wait a day, of course you can't. Steve Urkel: Danger's my middle name! Would you rather be buried or cremated? [the photographer takes a snap shot of Eddie nerously laughing as Carl drives him away]. Carl Otis Winslow: [after bringing Eddie home from jail] Now Edward, stop looking around for Steve. It's like wanting to touch a star- you know you'll never reach it but you've just gotta keep trying. [Willie is upset at Waldo as Laura shows up to the crime. You don't sleep, you don't have nightmares. Introducing yourself to someone new is always scary, whether you're on an app or in person, since the possibility of rejection is part of the deal. [Harriette laughs as Laura leaves the living room to help Mother Winslow get ready]. Waldo Faldo from Illinois. I-I-I see. Why, because of you, he's swapping recipes with Wolfgang Puck. Ms. Steuben: Get a hold of yourself, Steven. Urkel pronouns are the best. Ordinarily, I like a table right next to the water. Harriette Winslow: Now let's hit the sack. In Season 1 he was a supporting character and made his first appearance as a background character in Rachel's First Date and had his first major role in "Laura's First Date", however as of Season 2 he was officially considered a main character . Myrtle Urkel: Oh, how true, how true! Allison: Well then you better find some new friends, or you better plan to join a different sororiety. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: I got one of those once, did you know the sidewalk isn't a passing lane? Laura: Girl, have you ever seen the hair salon so crowded? Harriette Winslow: Carl, calm down, it's not the school's fault. Clarence has under control. 1. Steve Urkel: Swell, Punch! Carl: You know, bowling was a great idea. Undaunted, Steve switches the station to polka music and ends up having a good time dancing with Waldo and Maxine], Carl: By the way, thanks for letting me use your chamber, Stefan. While he was starring in "Family Matters" as Steve Urkel, White also began a side hustle as another staple of the era's popular culture . Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: As long as you're up, bring me a piece. Having aired 215 episodes, Family Matters is ranked third, behind only Tyler Perry's House of Payne (254), and The Jeffersons (253). Carl Otis Winslow: [fishing for the catch of a party Eddie wants to go to] Are his parents going to be there? Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Can it be a 976 number? Eddie: I'm the one who's taking the test. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Laura, suppose I arrange for you to meet Johnny Gill personally. Anywhere away from my Laura. Yesterday Richie and 3J were playing 'Nick and Carl'. Laura Lee Winslow: You're lucky, you got into a great fraternity and all it cost you was your best friend. I didn't kiss you. Why, a few sessions on the Muscle Master and you'll be drooling over my deltoids. What bright side, Weasel? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Chuck is twice the man Raoul is. Carl Otis Winslow: 150 extra people on what should've been a small family affair. Steve Urkel: So, you used me! Laura: Curtis, I got my hair done, my nails. Harriette Winslow: [grabbing Carl's hair] Carl [Takes her hand away, looking at it before placing it on top of his head instead]. I could hear him sobbing in his suspension chamber. Dadadadada! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No. Harriette Winslow: She says OGD's a great kid, but he hasn't had it easy in his life. Uh, we're, uh, playin' hide and seek! Steve Urkel: Uh-oh, Mr.Frostbite. I'm drawn to you. Laura: We're not going anywhere until the ground rules are straight. The truth is you deserve a kiss. Carl: Of all the names that I have called you , the one that bothers you is butthead? This isn't my grandmother. I just wanted to make things better but I ended up making them worse! Harriette Winslow: Carl Otis Winslow, I'm ashamed of you. Now I know, I'm not worthy of you- but I love you more now then I did then- Laura Lee Winslow- will you marry me? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Freddy Krueger! Why that low-down-cheap-bunder-headed-mud-slinging-bush-wacking-slanderous-snake-in-a-skirt is blackmailing you! Estelle Winslow: Your great grandfather's name was Lester. Steve Urkel: [Pointing to the floor] Him. Weel Good Lord man, she's an overnight success story. Willie Fuffner: Because, he humiliated me! Bushwhacker Luke: Me and me brother, we hate cops! I can't! But, it's only a compliment and it doesn't mean anything more than that. Steve Urkel: Can I have a glass of milk to go with my face? Rachel Crawford: When the paramedics got there, they thought SIXTY-SEVEN people had died! Carl Otis Winslow: I'll tell you what son, why not give me cash for Christmas. Your grandma is gonna fight for your right to party. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [cracks a laugh but tries to stop] It's so sad. Laura Lee Winslow: [enters the room] All right, Curtis. Alright. Harriette Winslow: You eat all that ice cream and you can kiss your diet goodbye. [cries]. Trying to cover it up only make things worse. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [to Officer Wigglesworth as played by Carl] We're on the same side of the law. Pass the salt, Edward. Waldo: [pause] Wow! [He and his partner grabs Willie and Waldo]. So, if I tell him I don't remember him, I'll look like a jerk and I still won't remember him. Waldo: [Monotone while Steve mouths his words with him] Pablo was a kind and gentle creature. Harriette Winslow: And I always mark the year, you gave it to me. Steve Urkel: Well, Laura, do you realize what you're asking? Can you give me some money so I can finish my Christmas shopping? 2023. So, I figured if I doubled the temperature, I could cook it in half the time. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's that? Steve Urkel: Loving you is like trying to touch a star. Harriette Winslow: Carl, those are my personal and private thoughts. Get up and get your own pie! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: You know, I never thought I'd see the day that I actually agreed with Waldo Geraldo Faldo. Rachel Crawford: Well at least we know where it is. Carl: Maybe you can even resurrect your band. Steven Quincy Urkel: I will *not* sleep in the bathtub! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No, I *am* a serious little nerd. I was in a high-speed car chase and ran out of gas. We only have to make one quick delivery. Eddie borrowed money from me. Lt. Murtaugh: No, because I brought him back. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [He walks towards Eddie and pulls out a folded flyer he took out of his pant pocket. Steve Urkel: Ms Steuben, you taught Laura to slow down and stop taking short cuts. I can't think of a single reason not to do this every week. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Ok dad. It is not empty at all. More like The Repulsions. Steven Quincy Urkel: [Grabs a blanket and a pillow and heads to the bathroom only to rush back out seconds later] No! You think it's cool to come to a prty with a mini bar in your coat. Did you see them work on Dora Fenswick? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: But you can't fire Waldo, he's our friend. Laura: [grabbing his arm] Ooh! I want more Punch! There's no one I wanna say no to more than you. Laura: [running in] Guess what? [leaves]. Don't they teach Black History at your school? I felt like I was one with the Bee-Oh-Sphere. Stefan Urkelle: Oh no, I didn't shut off the machine on time. Stefan Urquelle. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I'll have you know, I'm not in Italy. Oh, the room is spinning. Carl Otis Winslow: You know son, if Screwing Up ever became an Olympic event. I think I'm gonna have to fire Waldo, Steve. His parents were very upset. You need to get out more. All these people think the party is tonight. Urkelbot: [sneaks up behind the robber and surprises him] Freeze! Steve is the perfect son. Laura Lee Winslow: Now, for the championship and the toaster oven, who made the first patented shoe sewing machine? Carl Otis Winslow: Edward, who are all these kids? Get down from there! My, what strong arms. Then Urkel shows up with Eddie and Carl and the crowd cheers for him]. Steve Urkel: How tough am I? Trying to cover it up would only make it worse. Steve Urkel: I can't believe this! Laura: Wait a second. From 1989 to 1998 (via IMDb ), White . Look I clued everybody in. Estelle Winslow: Carl! CNN Actor Jaleel White is joining the growing list of celebrities who have launched a cannabis brand. OGD now knows the police aren't enemies]. Steve Urkel was the breakout character for the hit Friday night ABC sitcom "Family Matters" while Jaleel White who played him was the show's breakout star. Laura Lee Winslow: [comes in with Mother Winslow's dress from the dry cleaners] Ugh mom, this place is really getting gross. [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the last one]. Stefan Urkelle: Where did you learn all that? Let me tell you something though Weasel. [takes note and crumbles it, Laura slams locker door, revealing the word 'N*gger' spray painted on it]. Steve Urkel: You didn't even make it onto the chart! He finished his Christmas shopping weeks ago and never asked me for a penny. My daughter's been hurt and I can't do a thing about it. [He leaves the house]. And I hear myself telling her the same things my mother told me. I got fifty bucks on the Knicks. Stefan Urkelle: I'll have to buy new parts for the chamber. Carl Otis Winslow: I told him I was taking him over to see you. Carl Otis Winslow: I didn't bring my gun. He did for suspenders in the 1990s what Robin Williams' Mork from "Ork" did in the 1980s - he made them cool. That's one for the books! And believe you me, I know what being different is all about. [laughs]. Harriette Winslow: Honey, that's not true. And we practiced for six minutes! Steve Urkel: [drinking spiked punch] What is this? Steve Urkel: Oh, nothing. No one's ever called you 'shrimp'. Dec 25, 2011 - Explore Nadia Hussein's board "Steve Urkel", followed by 259 people on Pinterest. Will you marry me? Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, they applauded when we left. Steve Urkel: [dropping his bowling ball and hyperventilating]. Rachel Crawford: Little Richie spoke his first word. Stupid? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Oh that's sweet, what did he say? Eddie Winslow: [at the frat party] Steve, why are you wearing a toga? I'm getting penalized because I'm emotionally stable! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: It was on his tongue! Carl Otis Winslow: Yep, Benjamin Banneker. [walks into the bathroom]. Harriette Winslow: Oh lord. Steve Urkel: Oh, I see. Rachel Crawford: Sort of an Urkel Exchange Program? You know that in Kenya, "Urkel" means "a benign cyst on the foreleg of a wildebeest"? Laura Lee Winslow: [Urkel voice] Seasons Greetings, Winslows! With Squeeze I'm not safe nowhere. I can't even tell her it won't ever happen again! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Who do you think bought his first pair of shoes? Eddo. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [under laughing gas, laughing] I just realized, your name is Doctor Smiley. What about it, Steve. Uh, Curtis. Maxine Johnson: Yeah and poor you, you gonna miss your prom. Harriette Winslow: Harsh? It was the most terrifying five minutes of my life, second only to watching Lord of the Dance! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: The Snooze Juice. You think she'll really kiss Steve? Steve Urkel: This page is in Korean. When is that party supposed to be. Steven Quincy Urkel is a fictional character on the American ABC/CBS sitcom Family Matters, portrayed by Jaleel White. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Good answer! These kids are gonna ruin everything, they have to go. Steve Urkel: Edo, cheating is like wearing your grandmother's underpants. You think I'm fat. Carl Otis Winslow: [to the racist cop who pulled Eddie over] You know, I don't know how that badge stays up, because it's pinned to sludge. Steve Urkel: Uh, Eddie, is this a bad time? Calm down, easy. [Turns and squirts filling on Carl's shirt]. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Yes, those were very confusing times. She just slipped and I caught her. Anybody have more punch? Rachel Crawford: Steve, are you sure you're okay? It's not funny, it's dangerous. "Will you marry me for just one night?" 7. [laughs] Bye! Harriette Winslow: Oh, well it's nice to meet you, Curtis. Eddie: [chuckling] I know this one! This could be an emergency and I'm not even dressed yet! [Waldo and Maxine are dancing to R&B music and professing their love for each other. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: I prefer to call it sharing. [Pulls Steve to other side of room] Steven, last semester I specifically asked you what class you would not be taking this semster and you told me HOME EC! Steve Urkel: Well the good news is, my dad will do the operation for you. Well let me tell you something sir, if that's the kind of boss you are. I'll just begin a rigorist-training schedule. [Laura walks in the door dressed up in a stereotypical nerd fashion. Steve Urkel: To keep the camera on him and forget all the other meatheads. Waldo: Yeah, but I was so nervous when I asked her out that before she could answer, I barfed all over her shoes. She xeroxed it over and over and over and over and [Steve covers his mouth for one second. Let eserviate on the bright side. Rachel Crawford: Thanks Steve. I never got an 'A' before. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Weasel, you are the last person who should be giving me advice about girls. [Faces Eddie] Look at him, charming, handsome, popular. Steve Urkel: [Steve is suing Carl on the TV show Citizen's Court and Waldo has been called as a witness] Waldo, how did you feel about Pablo? As played by Jaleel White, the ultra-nerdy teenager with his whiney voice, awkward walk, pants rolled up high, and apprehensive catchphrase "Did I do. He left the minute we put a warrant up for his arrest. [faints]. I was not abrasive. Steve Urkel: Boyd whipped Eddie. Steve Urkel: I've fallen and I can't get up! This semester we're Steven, you'd better get going. [Goes to feel his head]. I'm in college. And OOHHH, and him! Harriette Winslow: Did I embarrass you, Carl? Judy Winslow: Brussels sprouts make me wanna puke. Steve Urkel: What? You understand? Carl Otis Winslow: I understand that. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What kind of plans? Carl enters her room with Eddie, who is struggling to stifle his laughter.]. Did you know an African American helped design the blueprint for Washington, D.C.? Steve Urkel: Oh great! Newsflash, Eddie!